Pleasure doing business with you.
oh, nice cat.
She is not my cat. Oh!
She's mine, and she's a boy.
who are you?
I'm birdgirl.
ugh.
Sort of in the middle of something.
is it more important.
Than the all-staff you're not at?
Say hi to judy, everyone.
Hi, judy.
Give me 10 minutes. I got to bolt,
So I'll take the flash drive and the money,
And in exchange, I promise not to hurt you.
Oops, forgot about me.
She didn't.
I'm joking!
birdgirl!
get her off me!
birdgirl!
Which is why a lot of people have told me
I should be a slam poet.
Birdgirl!
Sorry I'm late, everyone. Speaking of which,
I know it feels like time has passed us by here.
At sebben & sebben, but it hasn't.
We've just been waiting for our time to launch our company.
Into the future with the internet!
How's this affect the sandwich board teams?
Let's meet in my office to discuss.
To show the world we're ethical, progressive,
That we're turning things around.
and our first... uh...
I'd like to announce that...
We're redesigning the topple popple can.
I mean, look at it. It's as wide as it is tall.
It's not a can. It's a...
Oh, my god, you're right. It is.
Let's all applaud judy for making bold suggestions!
You're here to announce that e-mail thing.
Oh, right. Our first step in modernizing the company,
I give you...
It's mail time!
Ugh. You can turn that off, right?
Mm. You can turn that off.
Yeah!
it's mail time!
Whoops! You got phished.
Now proceed with this three-minute.
Internet security training video.
Now that we have a website, we need to choose a photo of you.
That's right. People will say,
"I wonder who leads this company."
And they'll click "leadership"...
Expecting to see a man.
But they won't see a man.
They'll see "hands clasped",
"Slightly off desk, strong, powerful" ceo.
Or "hands resting on desk" ceo.
They're just like us.
Are those the only choices? I look gross.
"Hands off desk."
It says, "yes, a woman runs this company",
But there's no reason to panic.
"She's got this." hands clasped.
she's aware.
How everyone expects her to fail, wants her to fail.
But guess what? She's not gonna fail.
Because she can't and will communicate all that.
In a picture. Guys,
I really want to change the topple popple can.
You're the ceo. Do it. Really?
Well, after you run it past the board. Oh.
Ow!
Come on, come on!
Aah!
Oh, father of light, it's just a dream.
Ow!
Come on, come on!
Oh, father of light, it's just a dream.
But something still feels off.
it's back!
So, turning our focus to asia...
Cut the judy. What aren't you telling us?
Everything... I'm telling you.
When you lie, your forehead swells.
That's why I always taught you at canasta.
Oh, my god. I look like an empanada.
What's that in the folder?
What, this?
Board members:
This is !
Your dad designed that can on a cocktail napkin.
People travel thousands of miles to have sex with their sig-o's.
Next to that statue downstairs.
Look, I'm not saying... they do?
Have you discussed this with carlo?
As topple brand manager,
I think he'd like to have a say in this.
This isn't the end. It's a beginning.
The beefy-handed can still enjoy a cold topple popple,
And now so can everyone else.
When I first started here,
Your father made a project of me... me,
A dog from down there.
Who was I to walk among giants?
But your dad saw something. Know what he told me, judy?
"Don't touch the can.
Never touch the can, not even to drink from it."
Maybe it was because I was a dog.
I've made up my mind. In fact, I just approved the new design.
You want to do this? Go ahead.
Call the factory.
Call the factory your father built.
To make one thing... The topple popple can...
And tell him you want to change it.
Charlie, what is all this?
Quick on-camera thing, all softball.
Focus on the future.
We're here with judy ken sebben, ceo of sebben & sebben.
And the custodian of beloved soda pop topple popple...
Until today, when she, a female ceo, killed it.
No! The product's not going anywhere.
It's just being repackaged. We're making the cans slimmer.
Why would you do that?
So people can pick it up.
Women people, right?
But only the manliest drinkers can handle topple.
Pop me another popple, farmer phil.
people love the can.
I mean, why are you destroying that?
Uh, sebben & sebben will always honor its past.
aah!
sebben & sebben.
Will always honor its past.
Topple nation:
Paul, when I saw you on the appointment list,
I was a little surprised.
I haven't seen you since you were... 9?
It's been a while, hasn't it?
So, what brings you in today?
Well, I need a check from someone who's been there.
It's a miracle, dr. Sheila.
My foreskin's back!
That's impossible. I snipped you mysel...
Oh!
It's beautiful.
I know. But in a way, it does make emotional sense.
Foreskins are highly sensitive,
And I'm a person who's always deeply felt things,
And not just in my penis.
This company's been asleep at the wheel,
And now we're finally doing something.
What's next? Let's burn some down.
I should take off my bra. This stuff is really good.
Why didn't anyone tell me?
gillian, you've been a big ally in this,
And there haven't been a lot of allies.
I've been an ally. I've had your back through this.
Which is why I'm putting you both in charge.
Of, uh, the rebrand.
Ooh, my head. This stuff is rat poison.
I'm sorry. Teaming us up?
We'll do a ton of premiums.
Um, and I have a tiktok content strategy locked and loaded.
Ugh!
we got another one.
Another one? It's been happening all morning.
The last one was dressed like an actual can.
We got a vintage topple tee.
I warned you, anytime you with a classic product,
There's gonna be some blowback.
You didn't warn me.
Well, I should have.
Don't be alarmed, paul.
I know this is a lot to process.
Talking foreskin?
Oh, not really. What's your name?
It's graham. Oh, pleasure.
Uh, there's a good chance you're killing dr. Sheila.
She's fine. I just knocked her out.
So we can have a man-to-skin conversation.
Oh, that makes sense. Question... why me, graham?
Why here? Why me, why here, why now?
I belong to an ancient people of sensitivity and feeling.
Who once thundered by the millions.
Across the plains of what you call north america.
But when, through a spyglass, we spotted strange ships.
On the horizon, we sensed danger.
We knew these men would prioritize inhibitions.
Over the mystical range of full feeling.
Well, I sure don't.
Which is why I'm here.
I'm super active in the genital-autonomy movement.
We meet at the church thursdays.
I have a few bear claws, me and a few other intactivists.
Oh, paul... sweet, sweet, sensitive paul.
You're just like your father.
you knew my dad?
Oh!
That thing attacked me!
Security! Aim for the !
No, wait! No, wait, please stop!
Graham! Graham, wait!
Foreskin gra-a-a-a-a-ham!
It's mail time!
Firewall breach! Ddos!
We have your information... Judy's information.
Contact you at 2:00, topple nation.
Ooh!
Topple popple.
A new day is here.
Where women and children and the terminally ill.
Can finally raise a cold one and join the topple team.
Plus, apparently, we have a tag line.
That I may or may not have heard.
Get your hand around it.
Hadn't heard that. I kind of like it.
"Get your hand around it."
Who wants to see the new t-shirt design?
We have to assume they've seen everything, know everything.
Evie, what's the plan? How should I know?
You're 10, it. You know this stuff.
So, I cruised the topple boards, and I organized.
All the online hate comments about judy into categories.
There's "weird," "weird-violent,"
"weird-sexual," angry-weird," "angry-sexual," and "funny."
My assessment is that judy needs to get the out of dodge.
Where you ask? To my safe house.
For people who've been canceled online.
Please charge that. Remember the racist grandpa.
Who pushed the 7-year-old off the pony?
No, you don't, because he's in my safe house.
Help!
Your cot's waiting for you.
It's 2:00. This is judy.
this is topple nation.
He's got cancer. What do you want?
One, publicly admit you made a horrible mistake.
In changing the topple can. No, I won't.
Two, admit that you are unqualified.
To lead the company your father built from nothing. No, I won't.
Three, apologize for being a dumb .
Nobody says that to my judy!
I'm not apologizing, and I'm not changing the can.
We hoped you'd say that.
We just published your phone number online.
balls: Judy,
This is balls of gordo and balls on power 101.
Permission to speak on air.
release whatever you want.
mer, gillian,
Continue the topple launch.
Jude, you know I support you,
But I don't want to get murdered over a soda can.
Which is why brian's joining you.
If anyone's getting murdered, it's him.
You two use the hate posts.
To track down topple nation.
A walk?
Come on, kid.
Welcome to prepucian.
I have to say, in man's world, I felt out of place,
But here, I belong.
As did your father.
Oh, please tell me about him.
When they take a baby away for circumcision...
Yes... We offer money.
In exchange for the child's foreskin.
I did not know that.
Those who won't sell are our hope.
For a common peace.
And my dad didn't sell.
Oh, he sold. Okay.
For about 7 bucks in today's dollars.
Uh-huh. He felt guilty.
And spent months wandering in the wilderness.
Until we found him, half wild, and nursed him back to health.
He became one with us.
Many of us spent time on his penis.
Isn't this just the best? Our first product launch.
Yo, dudes, it's the mother topple girls.
Okay, we're not the topple girls, are we?
We're gonna sell so much soda today.
Allow me to introduce you.
To the foreskin who saved your father.
Paul, this is miriam.
It's a pleasure to meet you, paul.
Oh, thank you for everything, miriam,
Especially for a satisfying explanation.
Of why my father walked away from us.
What's that? It's a transmitter. It's like 6g.
Hmm. And that's an altar for the sacrifice.
Oh. What are you sacrificing? Aah!
Oh!
What's going on? Graham! Ugh!
Your father was going to be the bridge.
Between humans and foreskins,
Two cultures united in love and sensuality,
And you came along and ruined everything by being born!
Aah! I know this smell.
And now you shall die!
Live. On instagram.
He's released your bank-account info.
And your social security number.
Oh, jude, he just released your sex tape.
Why didn't you just tell me you had a sex tape?
Because there is no sex tape.
Then what do they think they have?
Oh!
Glenn, we're six hours in to the leaked.
Judy ken sebben video, and there's still no sex.
So I guess we can call it a no-sex tape.
I set up a webcam.
So I could check on sir peter pants when I'm not home.
Lots of cat, no sex.
This is a billion times worse than a sex tape.
Maybe I didn't have my coffee strong enough this morning.
I don't know. I mean,
This is just a waste of time for the viewers.
I'm sick of this .
Get me a wireless account and a laptop.
You know, we got to get you one of these.
Where in the is brian?
He's the one who's supposed to be murdered!
Uh, shouldn't you have scanned that laptop for the topple virus.
Before giving it to jessica from accounting?
Charlie.
Check your wi-fi.
it's dead.
you're a genius.
Graham, why?
We now summon instagram stories.
What the
Ow!
Hey, guys, it's miriam.
I know I was gonna show you how to do a two-minute eyebrow hack,
But I thought I'd switch things up.
So today we're gonna sacrifice a real, live human.
Firewall breach, ddos.
Ugh! What the? We have your information.
Someone check the router.
Aah!
Aah! Aah! Aah!
Don't kill me, graham!
Hush, man, hush. I can't kill you.
It's not in my character.
If I get us out of here, you have to help me with something.
Deal? Deal.
Slap it. Ow.
How'd the launch go?
It was... Pbht!
birdvan phone.
well-done, judy.
How'd you know we were calling from a landline?
You like old-fashioned soda. Wasn't rocket science.
Is that a phone line, in a van?
Only line that works right now.
We used the virus to wreck the city network.
Oh, if you thought the no-sex tape was embarrassing,
Just wait till we release your ceo head shots.
Gross!
And all of your medical records,
Including gynecological.
Got it! It's only a couple miles away.
Hey, maybe we should check these people out.
Yes?
You like topple popple, do you?
Oh, I'm sorry. Is that a crime?
Not yet.
Those are some real meat hooks you got there...
Big and beefy.
Birdgirl!
Guys, we've got the wrong address.
Oh!
Look, let me do this.
I understand this guy. Let me bring him out alone.
You've got five minutes.
Nobody move!
Hello? Hello?
it's just me here, I'm afraid.
I know how you feel.
You don't know anything about me.
Disaffected, irrelevant.
Dog with bucket hat: Brian, brian!
It's not what you think!
The world changes, but you're the same.
Brian!
Nobody move! Show us your hands.
You're a... Woman?
And your hands, they're magnificent.
Step away from the mouse pad.
make me.
I had a whole spiel thinking you'd be a guy.
Not a guy.
Just a lady with big paws who likes her soda.
Why are you wearing a gopro?
Legal reasons.
Helen and I were together 37 years,
But then my host body, david, fell ill and passed away.
We could no longer be with her.
She was the love of my life, helen, and she's in that house.
Wait. When you said david, did you mean...
Yes, paul. Your father.
and when you say house, you mean...
A house. Aha.
Oh, I don't like this. What's going on in there?
Let's just see, shall we? I think we shall.
Brian? 1, 2, 1, 2.
it's been five minutes. Help!
You're the one in the costume.
ow!
Shouldn't you be on my side rooting for me?
I'm all for women ceos
as long as they keep their hands...
Off my cans.
You need any help in there?
No. We got this.
it's over. Topple is poppled.
The important thing is all your ladies' medical secrets are safe.
You're welcome. Um, why is a picture of my hooha trending?
Probably because I cloned all our files,
Sent them to all the major news outlets,
And told them to release it if they didn't hear from me.
It's called a failsafe.
It's in every spy movie, and it works.
You send it to the press...
If you want it to get out...
Not keep it a secret...
You idiot.
Yes, david was my one and only. I miss him horribly.
Well, what if you could share a piece of david again,
If just for a moment?
Helen!
Graham!
Oh, I somehow wish I could step away.
Well, we should probably be a-moseying down the road.
what's going on with you two?
You are about to have the best half-hour of your life.
I don't know why I'm laughing. new feelings.
Stay here with us, live as a thrupple.
There's absolutely nothing for you out there.
No, I must go. I have values.
I'm not gutter trash like you two.
But through all this, I somehow feel changed.
Now I have a responsibility to bring feeling back to mankind!
It's my power now!
New topple popple slim cans, topple popple classic cans.
If you a fake fan, get you that new.
Topple popple slim can light.
If you a day-one real one,
Stick with that topple popple classic.
Sure, that slim-can topple new new is 50% cheaper.
But that classic can is 50% realer.
Get your hand around that!
birdgirl!